Long day

[outlier_lynn]

I finally gave up for the awhile. There is something simple wrong with one of my scripts and I can't conjure up enough concentration to figure ti out. Something that is suppose to get treated like an array name is being treated as a regular variable. Damned if I can see why. I'll give it a break.

I had a moment earlier tonight when I purposefully put on my asshole hat. I even announced I was doing it. I am clearly upset about something and I can't quite put my finger on it. And that, of course, means I'm avoiding it. I can see that it's available if I care to actually look at it head on.

I'm afraid of what I'll find. It's another "lose everything" moment. It's a silly fear, but oh so familiar. It lives in a woe is me domain of martyrdom. And I hate being a martyr.

Enough.

I have two HAI intros scheduled. The first is this Friday night. I haven't led an intro in a long time and I'm excited to lead again. I'm going to bring my new skills to to the game.

The next one is September 10th. That one will require more work and a small production team.

The are going to be about 10 fresh faces each. I'm excited. I'd love to get five of those 20 into level 1. As of today, there are about 12 spots left more or less evenly gender balanced.

I'm thinking of making a poll about my hair beard. Not hat I intend to be held to the result (my head is not a democracy), but I'm mildly curious. I've no success at all with LJ polls, so it will probably be a Rocky poll. It might be interesting.

I'm going to give Michelle a call tomorrow. I think she is still home bound. I'll go visit if I can. I'm feeling a little under loved. Affection would be good right now. I'll get another picture of VJ, too.

I was a complete mess this morning AFTER I spent 5 minutes at my desk. After awhile, I decided to vacuum the office. Lots of Xingu hair in clumps around the office, lurking in corners and so forth. My sinuses gradually improved and my eyes stopped watering. I declare it official. I'm allergic to Xingu specifically and probably cats in general. Isn't that special.

I've kicked the covers off my bed two nights in the last week. I'm being VERY restless in bed.

veggiebelle plays a great Audrey in Little Shop. There are several scenes in which Audrey and veggiebelle remind me of Miss LaRue in How to Succeed in Business Without Really Trying. If you decide to skip this show... I'll have no sympathy for the self inflicted wounds you'll have from kicking yourself.

A few years ago, someone urged me to get a eyebrow piercing. Isn't going to happen. I'd just end up hurting myself with it in some way.

But I was thinking about my attitudes about piercing in general. When I was a young man I was completely opposed to any piercings including ears. I was oppose to most kinds of jewelry and all kinds of makeup. Coloring one's hair or wearing a wig were on my list of no-nos. I've changed a lot. :)

Lots of piercings are HOT. Not just because they draw attention to this bit or that, but there is something interesting about the idea of "making one's self more attractive." Completely primate behavior. :) Well, it works.

What ever had me drop out of love with everyone has slipped off into the night. I'm back on the Michelle bandwagon. Probably the baby. :) I'm also back on a few other bandwagons.

One of the things I think is missing in my life is certain kinds of conversations. I notice that when I'm with Donna and Dan or Michelle and Jim, that the quality and level of my conversations changes. And it throws in sharp contrast that which I don't have in my day to day life.

Hmm. Yes. That's it. That is a BIG part of my current level of dissatisfaction. Yes. Wow. Okay. Now there is something to do!

Off to enjoy being treated to food yet again.


Love.