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I was just thinking about a young cutie whom I seldom see but have a big crush on. When I see her in her sexy dance costumes and so forth, I'm clear that my hands need to be in my pockets or they might develop a mind of their own. And she is a bottom.
But I know something of her tastes as a bottom. She's a pain slut.
I'm not a top that can fulfill on that. Well, I can, but it isn't what I stirs me. I think I've been lumping bottoming into one big bag and rejecting topping because there are quite a few things I'm not interested in.
Heavy sensation has its own kind of reward, and sometimes I can get into the right head space to deliver that. But it is a translation for me. It's not my mother tongue.
On the other hand, a bound and blindfolded bottom who can't tell if the tool is cold or hot, sharp or dull or, at best, there or not there....
The unexpected.
It is about the surrender. I want to be surrendered to completely.
I have, for quite awhile, said I'm not fond of humiliation play. I'm still not. Why? It is not surrender. It's based on the force of the top and the powerlessness of the bottom.
I do not want to dominate in such a way that my sub feels powerless. I want my sub to voluntarily give up control. Even my non-consensual fantasies have more to do with turning the mind rather than dominating the body. Creating the Stockholm Syndrome in a way.
Playing the Pirate and the Princess to the degree where there are two pirates at the end of the story.
Ah! It isn't so much the surrender as it is giving up the notion of objective morality and playing with what feels good subjectively.
Oh dear! That's a connection I hadn't made, but that works VERY well. Yay. It is a breaking up of right/wrong and good/bad. Playing in Satin's backyard to prove there is no God. Whee! I like this.
But I know something of her tastes as a bottom. She's a pain slut.
I'm not a top that can fulfill on that. Well, I can, but it isn't what I stirs me. I think I've been lumping bottoming into one big bag and rejecting topping because there are quite a few things I'm not interested in.
Heavy sensation has its own kind of reward, and sometimes I can get into the right head space to deliver that. But it is a translation for me. It's not my mother tongue.
On the other hand, a bound and blindfolded bottom who can't tell if the tool is cold or hot, sharp or dull or, at best, there or not there....
The unexpected.
It is about the surrender. I want to be surrendered to completely.
I have, for quite awhile, said I'm not fond of humiliation play. I'm still not. Why? It is not surrender. It's based on the force of the top and the powerlessness of the bottom.
I do not want to dominate in such a way that my sub feels powerless. I want my sub to voluntarily give up control. Even my non-consensual fantasies have more to do with turning the mind rather than dominating the body. Creating the Stockholm Syndrome in a way.
Playing the Pirate and the Princess to the degree where there are two pirates at the end of the story.
Ah! It isn't so much the surrender as it is giving up the notion of objective morality and playing with what feels good subjectively.
Oh dear! That's a connection I hadn't made, but that works VERY well. Yay. It is a breaking up of right/wrong and good/bad. Playing in Satin's backyard to prove there is no God. Whee! I like this.
no subject
8^J
Moon