It's not the sex thing

[outlier_lynn]

Well, that just made it worse, actually.

I have been bombarded lately with other people's historic pain. The stuff that happened to them in the past. And everyone seems to have a great deal of it. I have let it rob me of hope. The general kind of hope that means we are learning as a species and we will stop the senseless violence. I am firmly resigned that people won't ever learn. And I'm sick of it.

I'm feeling apart and cutoff because I have chosen to disassociate from people and their never ending reliving of anguish. The never ending struggle to avoid being hurt by hurting first. The never ending struggle to make every damn little thing mean something cosmic. The never ending whining. The never ending blaming. The never ending ride on the roller coaster of circumstances.

Pain is a teacher. Sorrow is a teacher. Pleasure is a teacher. Life is a teacher.

I choose what is and I will not be a victim to my own cynicism. Enough of this whining of my own. Enough. I will create my day from nothing and I will create love and compassion for the people in the world including me.

I had forgotten my source of joy. I have found it again.

Love,
Lynn

Comments

[machineplay.livejournal.com]

>.<;; I wish I'd read this before I wrote you a nice long email.

Just kidding. I know it's hard to get swamped with other people's sh*t. I have a horrid time with that myself. It's okay for you to whine too, you know. Sometimes whining has its place because it brings up things that need fixing and sometimes they don't get fixed on the first try. We need those moments and we need to relive the pain sometimes so that we can grow again. Every time I pass through, I learn something more, something that's ready to heal, and I thank you for being there to witness it this time.

I'm glad you're getting your joy back. I worry that you will try to muster up too much of it from inside you, on your own, but that's a concern based on my own tendancies to burn out doing that.

Be well. :)

[crazed-lynn.livejournal.com]

My source comes from the possiblity I generate. And that possibility only has life in community. So my source is the power of community. When I try to muster from within me, I get the same old stuff. My mind isn't a nice neighborhood and I shouldn't go there alone.

Love,
Lynn

[satyrix.livejournal.com]

Never forget where your strength lies.
You don't have to accept negativity, although it can be insistant.
Embrace the pain you've had in your life, as it's as much a part of you as your joy; however, let neither control you.
Eat more chocolate.
All reality is based on perception.

Sure, these are all things you know; but I thought it might be refreshing to have someone remind you for a change, rather than you having to support and remind one of us.

Oh, and one other thing: in being love in the world, keep in mind that you are loved, as well.

That's all. Be well.

::be bops off::

[scixual.livejournal.com]

SOunds good to me!