Bah

I feeling disappointment. All around me folks are coming up short of my expectations. I have to let go of this feeling, but I also need to evaluate my expectations. Some I can just drop. I don't really want to, but I can. I have added a bit of meaning to it, though. I am giving up on a bunch of people. They are who they are doing what they do. It's a who and what that doesn't work for me so I'm just going to stop trying to make something work. I guess the win-win in these cases will be for me to just get out of the way -- theirs and mine.

A couple of disappointments I can drop easily. I'm not so much disappointed as much as I was living in wishful thinking. I have all the evidence in the world to back up the notion that people don't act in their own best interest in any objective way. I don't, and I can't figure out why I fall into the trap of thinking other people do! So, I've dropped those two. (It will make the Long Beach job more interesting in a round about way!)

Then there are the disappointments that might have a major impact on my life. These are the ones I'm concerned about. These are the ones that require decisions. Questions come up like: What do I want in my environment and what don't I want? What is there too little of and what is there too much of? Where am I in partnership; where am I a drag on others; where are others a drag on me? What is to be done with the answers?

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And in all of that, I am still disappointed. Well, this too shall pass.

I shant count the chickens

One of my cotrainers just breezed through the apartment searching for a lost airline ticket. In the rush and the ensuing conversation he seemed to think the company I'm contracting with has landed contracts with Florida and North Dakota. I don't consider him a reliable source, though. He tends to hear a sentence fragment and return a novel. :)

It would be nice to earn money for the next year or so. Nice to get some into the bank!

But, even if that doesn't happen, I'm happy enough with the work I'm getting. I'm schedled through May at this point.

I do like training. I have lost a bit of skill though. And my tendency to pontificate is hounding me again. :)

In other news, I've finished the program from Friday's Rocky.
( Hey, someone at my house... )